The silent path to the crib

– Okay this grid represents the room. All we need to do is plot out where each squeak is and we can find a quiet path to the crib.

– It looks like a map from Dungeons and Dragons.

– Except that the creature in the crib is a level nine poop monster.

– Okay now you check foot squeaks and I will mark them down

– Okay space A3 here we go… It’s squeaky, mark it

– It’s nice to think that you grew up in this room and now your daughter is going to as well

– Well I hope she has the same amount of sex in it I did. Now next square

– Why are you bouncing your hands in the air like that?

– It’s a tradition of my people: “If I were a rich man…”

– “Material Girl” needs to be retired that is your karaoke song

– So what we did was map out the entire room to identify every squeak but it’s easy once you get the hang of it. Step! Step! Hop, I got it!

– Don’t do that on the soft side …. I almost broke my neck

– Then simply sit, spin, stand, stretch … maybe elusive pants then step grab tiny pivot, pull and you’re there. Easy peasy, mac and you get the idea.

– You actually expect me to do this while holding a baby in the dark?

– Hold on…I don’t think she was impressed

-… bigger problems…I felt something popped.

Can you fill in the gaps in the sentences from the script?

1. All we need to do is plot out where each …… is.

2. We can find a quiet path to the …… .

3. Why are you …… your hands in the air like that?

4. It’s a …… of my people.

5. I almost broke my ….. .

Key

1. squeak

2. crib

3. bouncing

4. tradition

5. neck